Whine Dine and Wedding Rings

Okay, I'm not going to rehash the whole drama of my husband coming home with out his wedding ring on and even leaving in the morning without it on. You can read that post yourself here.

Last night he come home without it and never put it back on. We went out to grab a bite to eat. No ring. The point is this: he isn't even aware anymore when he doesn't have it on.
I feel naked without mine!!

So when we get back home, I ask where is it. He comes out to watch TV in his sweats with it on.
When I ask why, he says "You were whining so I put it on."

WTF?? Whining?  I must be really nagging when I tell him to stay out of the dating sites.

I'm still broke, in debt without a job. I don't see this ending well at all.

Unitl next time,

Jane

What to Say to My Cheating Husband

Last post I was angry, seeing red angry.
Today I am sad.
Most mornings I wake up sad. Sad settles in before I have a chance to fortify myself against it.
When I wake up it is very early so there aren't any outside distractions to chase sad away.
Nope, every morning I wake up and wade through an emotional soup of angry, sad, lost, hurt, frustrated and at some point I settle on one of them and have a minor melt down. Then I stand on top of all my feelings and jam them back into the place they hide all day.
And it all comes back to my husband. I was rereading a ChumpLady post this morning about what to say to your cheater. And she reminded me that there is no use in saying anything. They don't care!!!

I have been fighting the urge to say something to him. I hate keeping my mouth shut when I know he is online. Wouldn't it be funny to send little pop up chat messages to him from about 5 different profiles on the site saying things like "cheater cheater", "Hi 'his name'",   "say hi to your wife for me", "hey jerkface" and so on.

Or tell him I know you are still doing this. But he doesn't care. If he did, he wouldn't have done it the first time and certainly wouldn't have continued to do it after I told him it was unacceptable. So there you have it.

I'm in the same stuck spot I was when I started this post.

Lesson learned?  The first time I should have told him to leave. That's it. No please don't do that, don't do it again. Nope, time to go, he knew from the beginning that that sort of behavior was a deal breaker.

until next time,

Jane

Return to Sender.....Email Address Unknown

Today I was done.
Every evening my husband logs into, from emails that are sent to him,  1 or more of 7 dating sites he has profiles on, all that come to his main email account.

I've mentioned before how he thinks he is so sneaky doing it while I am in the same room. Of course I can log in the next morning and see exactly what he was doing. Each morning I am furious. So this morning, once my heart rate slowed down, I decided there was only one way to keep him from doing it. For these particular ones anyway.

I logged in to Benaughty, Cupid, Wildbuddies, Cheekylovers, Girlsdateforfree, Flirt and ClickandFlirt and  "updated" his email. I changed it to one of his old email addresses. Of course I logged in to that account and confirmed the changes. So even if he squirreled away any old emails if he tries to log in from the embedded link or typing in his email address and password, he won't be able to get in.

I hope I am home when he tries to log in.

Chuckle,

Jane

Men Outnumber Woman on Dating Sites

A man mentioned to me (on another blog site) that there are forums where cheating men go to discuss the online dating sites. He said they all complain about the disproportionate amount of men on these sites compared to women. 10 to 1 he told me.

As I thought about that at first I was annoyed that these men gather to discuss their online dating options....of course I've already written about the site that gives tips on how to cheat and not get caught.
Then the more I thought about it I think it's funny.

I have noticed on the sites I've created profiles in order to 'contact' my husband on them that as a woman I get tons of photo requests, chat requests and messages. But when I log into my husbands account  most of the activity is on his part...viewing their profiles. There are some views to him but often times a third to a half of those views are ME!! (I have several different profiles on each site) Plus I know from what I have read on the internet that there are many fake profiles put there by other people and the site itself.

The other day, as a last ditch effort to give him a clue, since closing his accounts don't seem to make an impact, I changed his sex from male to female. He doesn't seem to be logging in to them anymore. I suppose all the emails he is receiving for photo and chat requests from men are annoying him. Never have his profiles seem so much activity.

So as disgusting as he and men like him are, on some weird level, the joke is on them.

Until next time,

Jane

Just the Ticket

Look out, I have officially shifted in to anger mode.

There is a venue coming to town next month I would love to see. Not something I normally do in fact.

My husband tells me last night that he tried on his phone (not a very good phone) to look up on how to buy tickets for this venue, but couldn't figure it out. He tells me we may as well go and why don't I figure out how to buy the tickets and of course I agreed.

Then this morning after thinking about it I have decided that as much as I want to go I am NOT doing the leg work here. If he asks I'll tell him, "You can figure out how to set up extra email accounts, how to sign up for dating sites and how to apply for and get credit cards without telling me. So if it were important for you to do this one thing for me I'm certain you can figure it out."

Until next time,

Jane