Okay, so you are 95% certain he or she is "looking for love" online and may have even found it. If you want to go the route of setting up your own profile in order to catch him and have that evidence in order to make your next move first you have to decide where to look for him.
If you have nothing to go on, no sneak peeks at a website or email, there are several places to start.
His email provider...they all have ads in their emails (with few exceptions) you've even seen them in your email. See which dating sites his email is promoting. Go to the browser he uses and search for
"online dating", "sex personals" etc and see what the top ten hits are....aim for the free ones first, unless you have credit card receipts with something suspicious on them.
Don't forget to check the ones you see advertised on T.V.
Then there is the matter of sister sites. If he is on AFF, they have at least a dozen sister sites, some more freebie oriented than others.
Until next time,
Jane
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Adultfriendfinder Better for Men or Women
The past few days I've been doing a little experiment. I've logged in to adultfriendfinder as both my husbands profile and one I created as a woman.
As a man I've hotlisted and/or winked at over 60 women. Only two have browsed my profile, none have contacted or flirted with me and whenever I tried to contact one through the chat feature they were never available. But the oddest thing was that shortly after I hotlisted a woman it seemed that she logged in. Could be coincidence. I resorted to trying to interact to the women without profile pictures...it's always been my suspicion that the ones without a picture are more likely to be real.
Anyway, logged in as a woman I've been getting several views and messages a day......and as a woman I don't look at any male profiles and I certainly don't hotlist or flirt. If I log into the chat feature I'm bombarded with chat requests.....and no I don't have a picture. Hmmmm, I suppose that negates my theory about non picture profiles and possibly that is what is happening to the women I try to contact as a man...they are being bombarded, specially the ones with sexy pictures.
Thought I would share with you my experiment. I've always suspected that men were more likely to throw money at a shot at 'dating' a woman for sex than a woman would, so the dating sites use women's profiles to lure men in......give them enough to keep them interested but not enough to satisfy them so they are likely to shell out the money.
Oh well, until next time.
Jane
As a man I've hotlisted and/or winked at over 60 women. Only two have browsed my profile, none have contacted or flirted with me and whenever I tried to contact one through the chat feature they were never available. But the oddest thing was that shortly after I hotlisted a woman it seemed that she logged in. Could be coincidence. I resorted to trying to interact to the women without profile pictures...it's always been my suspicion that the ones without a picture are more likely to be real.
Anyway, logged in as a woman I've been getting several views and messages a day......and as a woman I don't look at any male profiles and I certainly don't hotlist or flirt. If I log into the chat feature I'm bombarded with chat requests.....and no I don't have a picture. Hmmmm, I suppose that negates my theory about non picture profiles and possibly that is what is happening to the women I try to contact as a man...they are being bombarded, specially the ones with sexy pictures.
Thought I would share with you my experiment. I've always suspected that men were more likely to throw money at a shot at 'dating' a woman for sex than a woman would, so the dating sites use women's profiles to lure men in......give them enough to keep them interested but not enough to satisfy them so they are likely to shell out the money.
Oh well, until next time.
Jane
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
10 Members Interested In You
Summer 2010, apparently my husband took out an online profile on Friendfinder.com. This will be the first one I found that he signed up for since he and I have been together. If you've read my other posts you will know that I found old, inactive profiles from two years before we met.
I had actually stopped looking......checking the traps I had set several years ago, but he accidently gave me the proof.
It was September 2010 and he asked me to help him with his email (not unusual, as savvy as he thinks he is, he misses the smallest details of online apps), he said he was having trouble logging in. He gave me a hotmail email (news to me). I asked why he had the new email...he said he was getting too much spam in his aol account....okay, I'll play along. So he gives me the log in and password. Hmmmm, jdell6606......his first initial, computer he uses and his favorite numbers...as explained in a previous post <http://isyourhusbandcheatingonyou.blogspot.com/2011/06/my-husband-has-left-trail-of-email.html>.
So I help him...his inbox, sent and trash are all squeaky clean.
A few days later he goes out of town on business (something he hasn't had to do in a few years so it was unexpected).
I know from previous experience that he doesn't have much chance to check his email the first few days on a job so I frequently check it myself. Sure enough, on the second day there's an email from Friendfinder.com stating that three members are interested in jdell6606. It's his information, no doubt, no picture though. As I look at all the information I see that he opened the account at the end of July. Suddenly the summer makes sense. He was annoyed with me all summer, I couldn't do anything right, he was argumentative and I was getting those check in phone calls when he worked overnight. You know the kind....they call out of the blue to see where you are and if there's any chance of you showing up. I won't make that mistake.....if he calls like that again, I'll say I'm busy and show up to see what he's hiding. Some people think the grumpy disposition is based on guilt but I think it was his way of convincing himself he didn't care for me or find me attractive.
Anyway, I printed out the information in case he went back in and deleted the account.
A few days after he came home I confronted him and his explanation was "I didn't open that account, they must have gotten his information from his aol account." Amazing, like a psychopath actually. And he stuck to his lie like glue. Funny, too because the information (including the user named based on his brand new email account) couldn't be gleaned from any of his online information.
So this is the first step in the chain of events that brought me to starting this blog.
Until next time,
Jane
I had actually stopped looking......checking the traps I had set several years ago, but he accidently gave me the proof.
It was September 2010 and he asked me to help him with his email (not unusual, as savvy as he thinks he is, he misses the smallest details of online apps), he said he was having trouble logging in. He gave me a hotmail email (news to me). I asked why he had the new email...he said he was getting too much spam in his aol account....okay, I'll play along. So he gives me the log in and password. Hmmmm, jdell6606......his first initial, computer he uses and his favorite numbers...as explained in a previous post <http://isyourhusbandcheatingonyou.blogspot.com/2011/06/my-husband-has-left-trail-of-email.html>.
So I help him...his inbox, sent and trash are all squeaky clean.
A few days later he goes out of town on business (something he hasn't had to do in a few years so it was unexpected).
I know from previous experience that he doesn't have much chance to check his email the first few days on a job so I frequently check it myself. Sure enough, on the second day there's an email from Friendfinder.com stating that three members are interested in jdell6606. It's his information, no doubt, no picture though. As I look at all the information I see that he opened the account at the end of July. Suddenly the summer makes sense. He was annoyed with me all summer, I couldn't do anything right, he was argumentative and I was getting those check in phone calls when he worked overnight. You know the kind....they call out of the blue to see where you are and if there's any chance of you showing up. I won't make that mistake.....if he calls like that again, I'll say I'm busy and show up to see what he's hiding. Some people think the grumpy disposition is based on guilt but I think it was his way of convincing himself he didn't care for me or find me attractive.
Anyway, I printed out the information in case he went back in and deleted the account.
A few days after he came home I confronted him and his explanation was "I didn't open that account, they must have gotten his information from his aol account." Amazing, like a psychopath actually. And he stuck to his lie like glue. Funny, too because the information (including the user named based on his brand new email account) couldn't be gleaned from any of his online information.
So this is the first step in the chain of events that brought me to starting this blog.
Until next time,
Jane
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
To Tell or Not to Tell
The age old questions: "If I know a friend's husband or wife is cheating, do I tell them?"
Since I have numerous, possibly dozens of online profiles in at least a dozen sites (no, they are not me or my stats....just bait for my husband....and yes, he has bitten....more about that later), I have wondered if I would see anyone I knew and it has happened. I have seen people I recognized from the area but I didn't actually know them or who they are....imagine how strange it was to be having a yard sale and look up to see a man I had seen on one of the sites!!
Anyway, I have seen a pathetic profile for a man that both my husband and I know, he is single, but knowing him, he's not a catch at all and seeing his picture....he's not attractive at all.....I'm talking "Larry, Daryl and Daryl" from the Newhart Show. But....good luck to him and who ever responds to him.
Then there is another man, both my husband and I know, that is married, but he states so in his profiles and I know that he and his wife have an 'open marriage', whatever that is.
But it still makes me wonder what I would do if confronted with that situation and would someone let me know if they knew about my husband.
Interestingly enough, last summer my cell phone rang and when I picked it up I heard a woman speaking....as if I had come in in the middle of the conversation. I thought it was a friend of mine and I started talking to her, saying her name.....it almost sounded like she was leaving a voice mail. I am from the generation of picking up a landline and interrupting someone as they were leaving a message and that is how this felt to me. So I paused for a minute in time to hear her say "I thought you should know" and she hung up. I checked incoming and missed calls....nothing and no voicemail. I realized it wasn't my friend and have never figured it out, even combing though my cell phone bill for incoming numbers.
The timing coincided with an online profile my husband had on friend finder, though I didn't know that until two months after the call.
Next post will be about that profile and how I found it and what I did.
Until then
Jane
Since I have numerous, possibly dozens of online profiles in at least a dozen sites (no, they are not me or my stats....just bait for my husband....and yes, he has bitten....more about that later), I have wondered if I would see anyone I knew and it has happened. I have seen people I recognized from the area but I didn't actually know them or who they are....imagine how strange it was to be having a yard sale and look up to see a man I had seen on one of the sites!!
Anyway, I have seen a pathetic profile for a man that both my husband and I know, he is single, but knowing him, he's not a catch at all and seeing his picture....he's not attractive at all.....I'm talking "Larry, Daryl and Daryl" from the Newhart Show. But....good luck to him and who ever responds to him.
Then there is another man, both my husband and I know, that is married, but he states so in his profiles and I know that he and his wife have an 'open marriage', whatever that is.
But it still makes me wonder what I would do if confronted with that situation and would someone let me know if they knew about my husband.
Interestingly enough, last summer my cell phone rang and when I picked it up I heard a woman speaking....as if I had come in in the middle of the conversation. I thought it was a friend of mine and I started talking to her, saying her name.....it almost sounded like she was leaving a voice mail. I am from the generation of picking up a landline and interrupting someone as they were leaving a message and that is how this felt to me. So I paused for a minute in time to hear her say "I thought you should know" and she hung up. I checked incoming and missed calls....nothing and no voicemail. I realized it wasn't my friend and have never figured it out, even combing though my cell phone bill for incoming numbers.
The timing coincided with an online profile my husband had on friend finder, though I didn't know that until two months after the call.
Next post will be about that profile and how I found it and what I did.
Until then
Jane
Monday, August 1, 2011
Fake Online Dating Profiles
A word about fake profiles....yes, I've created a few, but when creating a dating profile on any of the sites I have already mentioned or will mention in the future, a profile photo is optional. In it's place is an obviously male or female grey silhouette.
What I discovered the other day was the website http://www.digimarc.com. The reason I came across this was that I was trying to figure out how to put a watermark in a picture. What I found out was that with digimarc, you can put an electronic watermark in your photos and locate them online and see how they are being used. Which brings me to the reason I've gone techie for the moment. From what I have seen on these dating sites are photos, both head shots and nudes or partial nudes. Some of these seem to me to be fake profiles. Why I think they are fake I will go into later this week, but the bottom line is that there are fake profiles with profile pictures, which means someone's passport photo, graduation photo, resume pic or naughty photo is being used by someone else. Yes, there are people that put nude photos of themselves online...and that is their business but I'm positive that those photos are being used to spice up fake profiles.
If I were to use any sort of photo of myself online, I would certainly consider using digimarc.
Imagine, you are feeling bold and you take out a profile on Adult Friend Finder and post a sexy photo of yourself. You add the digimarc and by tracking that photo you can find out if it has been used to create a profile on another site, or is being posted on a porn site.
Better yet, if you are suspicious of your spouse, add digimarc to all digital photos and you can see if he or she has taken that great pic of the two of you, taken at your friend's wedding and cut you out in order to use it to get hook ups.
Also a good idea to make sure no weirdos are using your children's pics, innocuous as they may be.
What I discovered the other day was the website http://www.digimarc.com. The reason I came across this was that I was trying to figure out how to put a watermark in a picture. What I found out was that with digimarc, you can put an electronic watermark in your photos and locate them online and see how they are being used. Which brings me to the reason I've gone techie for the moment. From what I have seen on these dating sites are photos, both head shots and nudes or partial nudes. Some of these seem to me to be fake profiles. Why I think they are fake I will go into later this week, but the bottom line is that there are fake profiles with profile pictures, which means someone's passport photo, graduation photo, resume pic or naughty photo is being used by someone else. Yes, there are people that put nude photos of themselves online...and that is their business but I'm positive that those photos are being used to spice up fake profiles.
If I were to use any sort of photo of myself online, I would certainly consider using digimarc.
Imagine, you are feeling bold and you take out a profile on Adult Friend Finder and post a sexy photo of yourself. You add the digimarc and by tracking that photo you can find out if it has been used to create a profile on another site, or is being posted on a porn site.
Better yet, if you are suspicious of your spouse, add digimarc to all digital photos and you can see if he or she has taken that great pic of the two of you, taken at your friend's wedding and cut you out in order to use it to get hook ups.
Also a good idea to make sure no weirdos are using your children's pics, innocuous as they may be.
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