Prologue to A Blog

Basically this blog is the dark side of my marriage where I suspect my husband has periodically been “up to something” but haven’t been able to pin it down,  Has he cheated, has he just toyed with the idea? I’ll talk about what has happened and what I have done with my suspcsions. Maybe some of you out there will relate. Maybe in all this I will give some of you information from my experience that will help you in yours. I have learned how to get on and search the online dating sites,  the ones with the easiest to navigate search options and the best way I have found to search.  I will tell you about the types of men I have come across on these sites and how the profiles seem to run. No, I haven’t connected with any of them because I’m only looking for one man on them, my  husband.

Some of you are gong to want to smack me on top of my head and say “Wake up!” because some of this will seem so obvious to you. And I say, it’s always easier being on the outside looking in, when you’re in the situation it’s entirely different.

I’ve gone back and forth about doing this blog but in the end thought it might help me organize my thoughts. When things seem okay or even good I wonder if I was imagining things or maybe there was some explanation, but of coarse there isn’t. I’m bound up by circumstances and a lack of “in your face” proof. It reminds me of a story.

About twenty years ago or more, I lived in an older home in a mid western state…it was getting cold outside. I had a large orange cat. I walked into the old style farmhouse kitchen, he was lying on the kitchen floor and as I watched, a small mouse ran from behind the back door to the back of the refrigerator. I stood their with my mouth open as my cat glanced over his shoulder with a stupefied expression like “Huh, did I miss something?”  I think of that cat often because that’s how I have felt about this, like I just missed it, more of a feeling than a fact, until recently.

           
But I have found some proof, not on infidelity but of online profiles. I will share more on Monday.


Jane